There have been SO many thoughts running through my head this week and I really needed to get them on paper(i.e. blog). So last November I got laid off from my Quail Run Primary school job. Yes, a very sad and depressing week for me. But I got over it! I found another job through Kaplan and things were going great. Until about a month ago when I started getting antsy and bored again. My whole life I have been a busy bee. Whether it has been work, school, church, or sports, I have always been very busy. It's funny how life can be one way one minute and completely different the next. Needless to say I had the itch to get busy again. So I've been thinking about a few options. A. Going back to school. B. Continue looking for PE/Health jobs (which believe me are hard to find). C. Getting another part-time job D. Get a full-time job. I really like(d) the idea of going back to school and continuing my education, so I went to UVU and checked out their elementary education degree. It actually sounds really exciting and fun and I think I may even be applying in the next few days! If I have a degree in El Ed then I will be a lot more likely to get a teaching job, however, I will miss teaching PE because it is my passion. The program would only take me less than 2 years to complete and I can start as soon as this summer taking classes! I chose UVU over BYU because I wanted a different college experience. I LOVED BYU, don't get me wrong, but it's nice to try new things you know? I have also been searching for more PE jobs but yeah it is very competetive out there and the job market for that field is very sparse. I had a couple interviews this week with a chiropractic office and a Quick Check loans place and I am still waiting to hear back from them to get my hours up to full-time. As long as I can have a job that keeps me busy and keeps the money flow coming in I know I'll be OK.
Do any of you ever feel like you could be doing more in your life? Or am I alone on this? I thought after college I would either have a fabulous career going for me, or that I would become a mother right away and live happily ever after. I guess life isn't always what you expect it to be. Don't get me wrong, I am actually really happy with my life and have so much to be thankful for. I have a wonderful husband, family, friends, home, cars, a job, and a testimony. I really just want to be doing something that I love. I guess that is what it comes down to. When I was teaching I felt fulfilled. So I am very excited to be starting this elementary program. I think it will be really great!!!
Wednesday, February 9
Saturday, February 5
Memorial Service for Marlene Brown
Last Thursday I was woken up by a text from my dad. It wasn't one of those happy texts you expect to get in the mornings. I was informed that my grandmother Marlene Teresa Brown had passed away peacefully in her sleep at 6:30am. She had been diagnosed with liver cancer and COPD and congestive heart failure back in October. I had gone out to visit her in November with Spencer. The doctor said she was only going to live for a few weeks but she made it at least 3 months! So as I read the text I was completely shocked and confused since I had just woken up. As the day went on I started to feel more and more sad and cried a lot throughout the day. Luckily I had some good things going on for me that day to help me get through--a new haircut and visiting two new babies that I just love!
I am going to really miss my wonderful grandma. She was such a perfect person with a wonderful and big heart. If you knew her you would know how funny, loving, caring, and marvelous she is. She grew up in Massachusetts and married my grandpa while in Germany while he was serving in the army. They moved to California after he finished his service and lived in Fremont, California for most of their lives. This is where my dad and his brothers grew up and also the place where all the grandkids remember the most. We spent every holiday at this house and learned how to swim there in the pool. I have so many wonderful memories growing up at this house and I know I am not alone with all the memories. My brothers, cousins, uncles, aunts, and parents all share similar feelings and thoughts about this house. It is not just the house that made it so special. It was special because my grandparents made it that way. They opened up their home and even let people live there like my Aunt Joanne (grandma's twin sister), and some other relatives. My cousin Jessica and I would spend hours with my grandma trying on make-up, jewelry, her clothes, cuddling in her water bed and coloring in barbie books. These are just a few of the memories I hold dear to my heart. She was the perfect grandma!
When I found out about the funeral being held the following Monday, Dustin (my bro) and I decided to drive out early to help get things ready for the funeral. It was a long drive but we had a good time together. Dustin drove all through the night to Hayward and we arrived there at 2:45am (3:45 Utah time). We slept in until about 8am and began getting everything ready for the funeral. All the money for the funeral was donated in my grandmother's behalf. It was amazing how much money we were able to get in such a short amount of time. Dustin, my grandpa Brown, and I went to the funeral home (Chapel of the Chimes) to sort everything out and make sure everything was set to go for Monday. I have to say that the Lord had a lot to do with the funeral preparations. He was there with us helping and working his miracles.
My dad and Kris were there as well and everyone ended up coming to the funeral (including my mom). The viewing was on Monday followed by the service later that evening. It was difficult to see my grandma lying peacefully in her casket but also assuring knowing that she was no longer in pain and was in a better place with her family and the angels. The most amazing thing happened the night before though. Kris found this statue in front of my grandparents lawn that had a beautiful dolphin and angel carved into it. No one had ever seen this statue before--it had been hidden by some bushes and only the top of the statue was lit up when Kris found it. My grandmother LOVES angels and LOVES dolphins even more. She has been collecting dolphins for years! It was kind of like a miracle. So we brought the statue with us to the funeral and placed it in the casket right next to grandma during the viewing. Dustin was in charge of the service part and did an amazing job explaining my grandmother's life history. Each of the sons got up and spoke as well as the grandkids and my grandpa did too at the end. Every word that was spoken was just another testament to me and everyone else of how amazing my grandmother was. She touched so many people's lives and loved her friends and family more than anything! I had never heard such beautiful words spoken at a funeral as I did that night. I had no idea that a funeral could be so uplifting and motivating like it was. I spoke for a couple minutes and read a letter I had written my grandmother while she was in the hospital. I love her so much and will forever miss her! I am so glad we could give her the kind of service that she deserves.
Later that night Dustin couldn't sleep so he began going through some old letters and bibles that were laying around the house. Another miracle happened that night. As he was flipping through the bible he found a letter that was written by my grandma in 1988. It said "Do not open until my death." So Dustin opened it and read the letter. It was her testimony of the Savior and expressed her love for her family and life. It was such a beautiful letter and such an amazing thing that Dustin had found this. He read it to everyone the following day at her burial. The burial was not like a normal event. My grandma was to be put into a mosoleum in a crypt above the ground. I don't know if any of you have ever seen this but it's really cool. They put the casket on this machine and it lifts it up to the tomb where they slide it in so she doesn't have to be buried in the ground. Cool huh! So many of her friends attended her funeral. She was not only a wonderful grandma, mother, and wife, but a loyal friend to so many people.
After the services ended we all went to visit the grave site of my great grandmother Rose and her husband. We placed all the excess flowers from my grandma's funeral and placed them onto her grave. It was really special! We all then went to Texas Roadhouse and got really stuffed. My mom and Smokey both came down for the funeral so Travis and I got to spend some good time with them, too. We stayed at my aunt Sandy's house and she also attended the funeral. That night Travis, Dustin, and I all said our goodbyes and drove up to Sacramento to stay in a hotel since Travis had to fly out the next morning and Dustin and I had to drive home early. Travis got this awesome hotel deal from hotwire.com. We got a room for $60 that normally costs $200! There were two rooms, three beds, and two bathrooms. I of course got the king size bed and my own room. Hehe. Unfortunately Spencer had to stay home in Utah for the funeral because of work and school. It was very hard being away from him for 5 days but I tell you it really strengthens your relationship when you reunite! I suppose I agree with the saying "distance makes the heart grow fonder."
Dustin and I made it home by 5:30pm to Utah. We were both dead tired but so happy and lucky to be home to our families. It was a wonderful trip and I will never regret going. I love you grandma I hope you know how much you mean to all of us!!
I am going to really miss my wonderful grandma. She was such a perfect person with a wonderful and big heart. If you knew her you would know how funny, loving, caring, and marvelous she is. She grew up in Massachusetts and married my grandpa while in Germany while he was serving in the army. They moved to California after he finished his service and lived in Fremont, California for most of their lives. This is where my dad and his brothers grew up and also the place where all the grandkids remember the most. We spent every holiday at this house and learned how to swim there in the pool. I have so many wonderful memories growing up at this house and I know I am not alone with all the memories. My brothers, cousins, uncles, aunts, and parents all share similar feelings and thoughts about this house. It is not just the house that made it so special. It was special because my grandparents made it that way. They opened up their home and even let people live there like my Aunt Joanne (grandma's twin sister), and some other relatives. My cousin Jessica and I would spend hours with my grandma trying on make-up, jewelry, her clothes, cuddling in her water bed and coloring in barbie books. These are just a few of the memories I hold dear to my heart. She was the perfect grandma!
When I found out about the funeral being held the following Monday, Dustin (my bro) and I decided to drive out early to help get things ready for the funeral. It was a long drive but we had a good time together. Dustin drove all through the night to Hayward and we arrived there at 2:45am (3:45 Utah time). We slept in until about 8am and began getting everything ready for the funeral. All the money for the funeral was donated in my grandmother's behalf. It was amazing how much money we were able to get in such a short amount of time. Dustin, my grandpa Brown, and I went to the funeral home (Chapel of the Chimes) to sort everything out and make sure everything was set to go for Monday. I have to say that the Lord had a lot to do with the funeral preparations. He was there with us helping and working his miracles.
My dad and Kris were there as well and everyone ended up coming to the funeral (including my mom). The viewing was on Monday followed by the service later that evening. It was difficult to see my grandma lying peacefully in her casket but also assuring knowing that she was no longer in pain and was in a better place with her family and the angels. The most amazing thing happened the night before though. Kris found this statue in front of my grandparents lawn that had a beautiful dolphin and angel carved into it. No one had ever seen this statue before--it had been hidden by some bushes and only the top of the statue was lit up when Kris found it. My grandmother LOVES angels and LOVES dolphins even more. She has been collecting dolphins for years! It was kind of like a miracle. So we brought the statue with us to the funeral and placed it in the casket right next to grandma during the viewing. Dustin was in charge of the service part and did an amazing job explaining my grandmother's life history. Each of the sons got up and spoke as well as the grandkids and my grandpa did too at the end. Every word that was spoken was just another testament to me and everyone else of how amazing my grandmother was. She touched so many people's lives and loved her friends and family more than anything! I had never heard such beautiful words spoken at a funeral as I did that night. I had no idea that a funeral could be so uplifting and motivating like it was. I spoke for a couple minutes and read a letter I had written my grandmother while she was in the hospital. I love her so much and will forever miss her! I am so glad we could give her the kind of service that she deserves.
Later that night Dustin couldn't sleep so he began going through some old letters and bibles that were laying around the house. Another miracle happened that night. As he was flipping through the bible he found a letter that was written by my grandma in 1988. It said "Do not open until my death." So Dustin opened it and read the letter. It was her testimony of the Savior and expressed her love for her family and life. It was such a beautiful letter and such an amazing thing that Dustin had found this. He read it to everyone the following day at her burial. The burial was not like a normal event. My grandma was to be put into a mosoleum in a crypt above the ground. I don't know if any of you have ever seen this but it's really cool. They put the casket on this machine and it lifts it up to the tomb where they slide it in so she doesn't have to be buried in the ground. Cool huh! So many of her friends attended her funeral. She was not only a wonderful grandma, mother, and wife, but a loyal friend to so many people.
After the services ended we all went to visit the grave site of my great grandmother Rose and her husband. We placed all the excess flowers from my grandma's funeral and placed them onto her grave. It was really special! We all then went to Texas Roadhouse and got really stuffed. My mom and Smokey both came down for the funeral so Travis and I got to spend some good time with them, too. We stayed at my aunt Sandy's house and she also attended the funeral. That night Travis, Dustin, and I all said our goodbyes and drove up to Sacramento to stay in a hotel since Travis had to fly out the next morning and Dustin and I had to drive home early. Travis got this awesome hotel deal from hotwire.com. We got a room for $60 that normally costs $200! There were two rooms, three beds, and two bathrooms. I of course got the king size bed and my own room. Hehe. Unfortunately Spencer had to stay home in Utah for the funeral because of work and school. It was very hard being away from him for 5 days but I tell you it really strengthens your relationship when you reunite! I suppose I agree with the saying "distance makes the heart grow fonder."
Dustin and I made it home by 5:30pm to Utah. We were both dead tired but so happy and lucky to be home to our families. It was a wonderful trip and I will never regret going. I love you grandma I hope you know how much you mean to all of us!!
My grandma is the one in the pink shirt. Her twin Joanne is in the blue. They are hilarious together!
As part of the service my grandfather Ed Brown spoke about his loving wife. He loved her so much!
After the service we took some group shots
Dad, Dustin, Me, Mom, Travis
My grandpa did a wonderful job ordering the flowers!
Rest in Peace Grandma!
My cousin Erik came down. It was so great seeing him. It has been forever!
The next day. All the boys held hands while walking behind grandma. So precious!
All of my grandma's many friends. I'm sure she had a lot more too!
Uncle Bob saying a few words of thanks before they dedicated the grave.
Dad and Kris saying their goodbyes. We all put flowers on top of her grave. She loved flowers :)
When I visited my grandma in the hospital she reminded me of a beautiful rose because of her good nature and positive outlook on life. So I took a flower home with me to remind me of her. This is it. This is also how they lifted her casket into the tomb.
The three amigos plus Aunt Sandy (my mom's older sis)
All the paulbearers in all their glory!
Dad, Uncle Ron, Uncle Bob, cousin Erik, Dustin, Travis
The whole Brown family!
From back to front: Kris, dad, Ron, Bob, grandpa, Erik, Dustin Travis, Jan, Aunt Sherry, Julie
My great grandmother Dorothy Rose and Elmer. We love you grandma!
If you read through my whole post you'd understand this picture!
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